How in the world did it get to be September? Wasn't it JUST February?
I'm sitting here on the back porch, coffee within reach, listening to the sound of the fan blowng and a random bird chirping. It's relatively quiet and kinda peaceful. It's Labor Day - no plans, expectations or obligations await the day. Without a plan I am sitting here thinking, "Shit, this is a tad boring"...but then I thought..."wow, how awesome to just BE".
Just BE - what does that even mean to me? When I reflect on that I realize that I have no earthly idea how to just relax and let the day unfold as it does without any help from me. Am I lazy? Maybe. But in a good way. I spend countless days wishing for these moments of nothingness and when I finally get them I feel like I should be doing something to fill the minutes. Isn't it okay to take minutes and just enjoy that I have them and let that be enough?
A work I am co-worker, manager, and liason. At home I am wife, mother, grandmother, sister, friend. There is a deep pull to happily balance every single person and responsibility at once while sacrificing Renee; the person behind the person. I have forgotten, or not noticed, that Renee actually exists somewhere amid the busy chaotic lifestyle that is my life.
It's September. Leaves will start to change as the seasons morphe to another. It's time to morphe with the colors of red, orange and yellow and take times of self-care and selfishness and just BE. Just BE and learn to love myself - to Life myself - to be in love with Renee so that I can honestly give my love to those I love!
Peace, Love and Coffee!
