There's No One Home.....

Every morning I wake and have to mentally remind myself that my parents are gone. When I drove to work I reminded myself. When I went to and from my doctors appointment today - I had to remind myself. As I drove home from Walmart-hell after work, I had to remind myself.... these are all moments when I would've picked up the phone and called 'home' to chat. I cried all the way home; picked up my cell phone several times to find someone to call. Who would I call? What would I say? "Hey, I just wanted to call and cry in your ear. That's all... thanks for listening". Then I told myself that I have no one to call and put my cell back in my purse. Oh, I have my brothers and sister... but how can I put my grief on them when they are dealing with their own? What about R2? He has more than enough going through his mind with deployment preparation. Again - what would I say to someone that I called anyway?

I told myself to suck it up...fixed my make-up, put away my groceries and made my husband an amazing dinner.