She Came.....And Went...

 My Mother's birthday was Sept.1st. I started the day at 6:30am by calling in at work. I just couldn't pull myself out of my grief to make it to work. I spent the morning crying and sleeping. It was my Mother's 68th Birthday. God, I miss her so much!

Sept 2nd brought my Aunt E (my Mother's closest sister - she was with us when my Mother died), to town for the long weekend. As I waited for her to come down the terminal stairs at our local airport, I wondered what I would feel. Then I saw her descend the escalator to the waiting area. As she cleared the stairs and walked towards me...I saw my Mother. My God...., She looks like my Mother. My heart and throat clinched in grief but I held tight to myself. When she got to me, we embraced...I held her tightly..trying to feel Mama...Aunt E looks so much like her - was her closest sister...mannerisms were the same. Mother trusted Aunt E to take care of us and I know she waited until Aunt E. arrive on Dec. 28th, before she died on Dec. 29th. She knew Aunt E would help us. love us. be there with us.

The long weekend was spent talking, laughing and a little bit of wine! We introduced her to Trivia Night. We drove to Florence to the cemetery so Aunt E could leave flowers. I wasn't sure how it would go, but Aunt E did very well. Sunday was the Family Breakfast with my brothers, sister and all of our children and grandchildren (those that could make it). Two months ago my oldest son, Josh, coordinated a monthly family breakfast - the only excuses to not being there are if you live too far away and/or you had to work. This family time is a promise to each of us to carry on and stick together without our folks. We were honored that Aunt E was able to be there with us.

There were many moments throughout those 5 days with Aunt E that I saw reflections of my Mother..it was heart-warming and sad at the same time. It was difficult for her to see us too - we look like our Mother. We are a reminder to her that Mother is gone and we remind her of that awful day in December. Her visit helped to ensure us that we are not alone. I told her that we've been floating - not tethered to our extended family...just 'here'. She helped us to see that we have her & our uncle...we also have our Dad's brother too, to keep us grounded and connected to 'family'.

We are orphans now...that's such a strange but true word.

But we are now coming into our new family.