May 2, 1966....

Today is my 44th Birthday!

I remember sitting in church when I was little girl, playing with a calculator that I had "snuck" in. While Bro. so-and-so was preaching Hell and damnation, running up and down the aisle of our Freewill Baptist Church, Daddy sitting in the pulpit (he was the Deacon) watching us kids - to make sure we weren't acting up - I punched out numbers into this tiny adding machine. This was in the mid-70's. "What year will it be when I turn  16?" 1983 - Oh, my goodness. That's so far away!! "When I'm 20, what year will it be? " 1987. I can't believe that I will EVER be that old!! " In the year 2000, how old will I be?" 34 - No way!!! Why, that's older than Mama"! Sitting in the pew that Sunday, I was astonished that I would grow old....wouldn't stay a little girl forever.

I wasn't alone in my journey of aging. Just after midnight on May 2, 1966 I was born...followed 5 minutes later by my sister. The story goes that we were a complete surprise! Our heart beats were identical, so through 8 months there was only one strong beat to be heard. One Heart Beat! Now, we've heard stories about how it all went down..the doctor coming out and telling Daddy that there were "2 Babies", Daddy dropped his coffee cup! We were labeled Baby A and Baby B; they had one name picked out, but not another - so they had to go back to the drawing board. When were were packing up Mom & Dad's things a few months ago I came across the receipt "paid in full" for our birth - $250.00.

We also grew up hearing the story about when Rhonda & I were born, our brothers (3 & 1 1/2) each "took a twin"..after a short while they traded!

Being an identical twin has it's challenges - it wasn't easy by a stretch. Well, when we were little there was a comfort in having someone to play with - when we got older it became a pain in the butt. Mama dressed us alike until we were started 7th grade. That year we could wear the same thing but in a different color. In 8th grade we were free to do what we wanted - I cut my long hair off dinky short and we never wore matching clothes again.

We often stood in front of our bedroom mirror just staring at our images. "People are crazy", we'd say. "We don't look a thing alike". I remember one time in our mid-20's, driving up to Michigan where she had moved, early one morning. The sun had just come up. As I drove up to her house, Rhonda was standing on her porch, not a lick of makeup, her long hair blowing, wearing a flannel, jeans and boots - I thought then at that very minute, that she was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen and I wished I could look like that! I've never forgotten that moment in all these years. She's still the most beautiful!

We fought hard for our own identity; fought the twinness and each other - sometimes winning the battle, sometimes losing it. We were "The Twins", "The Girls", "The Blocker Twins", "Rhonnanea" (to our cousins who couldn't tell us apart). We couldn't escape it. We hated the comparison, the expectations, the feelings of inferiority, jealousy, loneliness, and 'not feeling good enough', the fighting and bickering, that being twins gave us. We went our separate ways during and after high school - following our own paths. It took us 14 years to find the path back to each other.

Rhonda lives with me now that Rich is gone! Who would've though that "The Blocker Twins" would be living under the same roof again? I could almost hear the breath suck in and eyebrow raise from our family when we announced that we'd be living together. Just us (okay..the house is not empty by any stretch), but for the first time - it really is just US. There's a comfort to know that she is on the other side of the house, in the next room, or coming home, that keeps me semi-sane during this time in my life. I hope that I'm a strength for her, too, in some way.

So, Happy Birthday Sister! May you always know that you are beautiful and always remember that I love you! Grow old with me! I Love You!







 Love, Peace & Birthday Cake!